It's never too late to go wrong.
The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to
catch up.
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
They worship the ground that he walks away from.
I have never killed a man, but I have read many
obituaries with great pleasure.
Sarcasm: A literary device for identifying the stupid.
If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must
first invent the universe.
I like long walks, especially when they are taken by
people who annoy me.
When ideas fail, words come in very handy.
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new
bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and
asked Him to forgive me.
I am easily satisfied with the very best.
He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first, and call
whatever you hit the target.
I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't
it.
When people are free to do as they please, they usually
imitate each other.
It is not necessary to understand things in order to
argue about them.
Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.
Absence makes the heart want to fondle other people.
I wish we were better strangers.
A true friend stabs you in the front.
We have the best government that money can buy.
The United States is a nation of laws: badly written and
randomly enforced.
She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success
wrong by wrong.
I thank God that you are unique!
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